please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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