people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
