:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
