so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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