ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
they need to just BURY HIM!
can u get pink eye on your cock?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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