Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
