He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
ttyl tear gas
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Randomize
