So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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