great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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