Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
