she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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