so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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