I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
