Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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