I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
