Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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