she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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