Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Randomize
