Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i just google imaged poop.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
