So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
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