The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
They are going to name an STD after you.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
