Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
