I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
