singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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