It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
