I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
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