I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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