Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
