oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
