the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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