you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
YAS. BRING CRAB.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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