Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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