when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
