Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
