i just made my gag reflex go away.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Randomize
