In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
