Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
