are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
