What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Who did Billy Mays play for?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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