I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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