You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
