My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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