there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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