He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Dick very happy bro
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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