Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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