Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
