i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
