I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
