You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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