I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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