i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
